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Doherty detained at Her Majesty's pleasure in time for Queen's birthday
Both of prize-pratt Pete Doherty's fans are said to be devastated after the ex-boyfriend of coke-fiend Kate Moss once again broke his solemn promise to stop getting caught with drugs. The alleged musician, who gives his address simply as 'Thames Magistrates Court, London' gave the Queen a surprise birthday present by booking himself in for yet another stay behind bars: "It's not true," said a clearly upset spotty oik in Camden with black mascara running down his face, "Pete would NEVER give his drugs away!"
The failed former burglar was apprehended just hours after somehow managing to hoodwink a judge into sparing him from a prison sentence. The trilby wearing twit was convicted of a string offences including possession of Class A drugs, dangerous driving and releasing crap music likely to endanger public health. But instead of sending the one-man-crime-wave down the judge instead banned pathetic Pete from driving and sentenced him to an 18-month supervision order.
However it now appears that the drug-addled dimwit didn't quite realise his supervision would start immediately - as police observed him apparently attempting to sell suspicious substances less than three hours after his court appearance. The rozzers carted the ASBO-chaser back off to the nick where he spent the night in the familiar surroundings of what has become his specially reserved cell.
Doherty's lawyer, the hardest working man in the British music industry, once again found himself having to bail out his custody-loving client. On his latest release the supposed singer clashed with reporters, telling one of them: "I feel like smacking you, mate!" - perhaps not the first time in 24 hours he'd been overheard trying to dish out smack.
Pete Doherty gained notoriety for his relationship with Kate Moss. Various unconfirmed rumours have been circulating that he's also in some sort of band. Last year Elton John famously invited the serial jailbird to join him on stage at Live 8 in the mistaken belief that he could sing.
Meanwhile, a flurry of furious betting that Doherty's next arrest will occur within less than seven days has forced William Hill to close their books: "We've studied the form," said a spokesman, "and Doherty's got plenty of it."
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