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Blair April Fool's prank "is real cause of Brown rift"
DeadBrain has leant from a senior cabinet insider that a hilarious but cruel 1st April practical joke is responsible for the current acrimony between the Prime Minister and the prank's victim, Gordon Brown. According to the source, all cabinet members were summoned by Blair to a 'secret emergency session' on Saturday morning. They were then briefed on the gag and briefly discussed the security situation in Iraq before the Chancellor, deliberately summoned 30 minutes later than others, made his arrival upon which Blair commenced the shenanigans.
The Prime Minister told his cabinet that he had decided to leave the top job with immediate effect after discussions with his wife and children. Most of the cabinet were feigning shock throughout this apparently dramatic resignation speech, but John Prescott was unable to contain his laughter as soon as Blair symbolically handed the keys of 10 Downing Street to his Chancellor and had to leave the room, neatly disguising his hysterics as a coughing fit. Even visiting US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was roped into the deception, handing Brown an envelope purportedly containing his foreign policy instructions.
Brown was said to be "grinning like a schoolboy" meanwhile before he was brought down to earth in brutal fashion. He was informed by Blair that the Queen 'was on the line' wishing to express her congratulations. The Prime Minister then quickly dialled David Cameron's Office on the cabinet telephone before handing the receiver to the soon-to-be humiliated victim. The room "exploded with laughter" as Brown asked the Tory leader's private secretary for permission to speak to Her Majesty. Our source informs us that he then stormed out of the room like "a bear with a sore head" and has sought revenge since the incident by ringing the Prime Minister's bedroom phone at unseemly night time hours.
That the Chancellor still bears a bitter grudge is contested by a Brown aide, however, who told DeadBrain: "Although Gordon is rather prudent with public displays of humour; he's a bit of a comedian really. He loves cracking jokes when watching the football with his chums in the pub and accepts that occasionally being on the receiving end is all part of this. In fact he's just like you or me isn't he?" he contested.
The question of who inspired the prank is unclear at the moment, as the Prime Minister is not personally renowned for his sense of humour. Suspicion may fall on former stand-up comic Charles Clarke, but it is equally feasible that a well-known transatlantic prankster provided comic guidance. The gag bears similarity to a little reported incident in the White House on April 1st 2005. George Bush jokingly convinced several officials in a top-level meeting that he had just ordered air-strikes on Italy, although regrettably on this occasion several of them had to be rushed to hospital after fainting.
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