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Hutton Inquiry rules on BBC "propaganda"
26 Jan 2004 by hraCounsel at the Hutton Inquiry today issued a ruling on the controversial TV documentary 'Pantsorama' screened by the BBC on Wednesday 21st January. Following a wave of public protest that none of the other parties in the judicial process had been granted the means to broadcast documentaries that were highly critical of themselves at public expense, senior QC Douglas Ramsbottom ordered the following changes to BBC broadcasting schedules in order to ensure an unprejudiced and fair outcome to the Inquiry.
Sexed-up in the City
A 45-minute drama produced by an unnamed and unnameable security service at its showpiece monolith on London's Embankment. Based extensively upon a screenplay written twelve years ago by a semi-literate Californian student, this epic saga of cack-handed plagiarism and even more cack-handed forgery was first shown to a specially-selected audience of under-fives at the House of Commons, thus ensuring its relevance to the war in Iraq.
Tony Blair Survival Secrets
A 45-minute insight into hitherto undisclosed techniques of escape and evasion through a political minefield stretching all the way from Washington to Baghdad (due for extension to North Korea in a future episode). Pursued by an ever-increasing horde of former Cabinet ministers, former Chief Weapons Inspectors, former spin-doctors and anyone else who doesn't like being lied to, Tony covertly deploys his latest weapons of mass deception in a desperate attempt to avoid his grisly fate.
The Good Old Days
A 45-minute fly-on-the-wall interview with one of the Middle East's most duplicitous (and duplicated) dictators, secretly filmed at a secret location somewhere secret in Langley, Virginia. Saddam reminisces on the golden era when no-one was ever killed by friendly fire in Iraq, when US and UK military personnel were free to walk around unharmed even without body armour (especially when they supplied him with matériel for his weapons programme) and when George W Bush only talked about pretzels and baseball.
The Bush Administration
A 45-minute gardening programme which has no relevance whatsoever to international politics.
Greg Mullet of Auntie's Broadcasting Corporation was unavailable for comment.
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