| ||Liberal Democrats call off mass strike
5 Nov 2002
A surprise strike by the Liberal Democrats was called off today by their leader, Charles Kennedy. The Lib Dems, who had been striking because nobody paid them any attention, cancelled "a week of industrial unrest, mass protests and riots" after nobody noticed they were on strike.
"There's really not that much point in doing this," said an "emotionally unbalanced" Mr Kennedy from his rented soapbox in Piccadilly Circus. Speaking to a "crowd" of three people, two of which were his bodyguards and one of which was a policeman asking him to "move along now you nutter", he received little attention.
The Liberal Democrats, the third party in Britain, have long struggled to get media attention. Previous tactics have included "having sensible-ish policies, not being the Conservative Party and jumping up and down in Trafalgar Square", but to no avail. The failure of this latest tactic comes as no surprise to political analysts, who called it "pretty daft", but doctors are now concerned that Mr Kennedy might be suffering from depression.
Look at this, moron.