Ambitious plans announced for election night coverage
5 May 2005
The widely detested satire website "DeadBrain" has announced plans for its coverage of election night 2005. Speaking to playful toddlers at a local crèche, Editor-in-Chief Gregory T Mullet launched what he described as the website's "most ambitious" coverage yet.
From 10pm tonight it will offer live reports from constituencies around Britain, with analysis from top experts including DeadBrain's political editor, Douglas Ramsbottom, statistician Bernard McDougal and renowned pensioner Brenda Shuttleworth.
It will also be joined in a specially-constructed studio by a wide range of celebrities, including "the bloke who used to be in Corrie", "2002's Widow Twanky from the Eastbourne Playhouse" and the former comedian the ex-Bobby Davro.
The most accurate exit poll ever taken will be shown live online as soon as polls have closed, and DeadBrain's answer to the swingometer – the Swede-ometer – will be making regular appearances throughout the evening.
DeadBrain's army of election bloggers will also be keeping an eye on the night's television coverage, reporting on amusing mishaps and the state of David Dimbleby's glasses.
Mr Mullet added that the coverage would be archived on the site for later viewing, "just in case anyone has anything better to do than stay up all night, like me".
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