News Satire Spoof Parody Humour Ann Widdecombe
23rd November
Updated from time to time
War on Terror

Dumbed Down: That anti-terror legislation in brief

I

All terrorists to be put under house arrest
All houses to be put under terrorist occupation
No homes to be left
No wrongs to be right
No rights to be respected

VI

All Liberal Democrats to be tagged
All Conservatives to be tigged
All faces to be saved
All votes to be bought
All pings to be ponged
All pongs to be ponged right back at you, bitch

IXVII

Terrorists to be banned from using explosives
Sunsets to be banned from using the internet
Santa Claus to be banned from using the telephone
Rudolf to be banned from watching television
Everyone to be banned from watching Santa Claus: The movie

MXCVIICIII

Burden of proof to be scrapped
Proof of tax burdens to be hidden
Proof of other burdens to be heard by judges
Judges to be controlled with little hidden wires by Charles Clarke
Trial by jury to be abolished
Trial by viewers of Sky News to be institutionalised
Rupert Murdoch to be next Lord Chancellor

MMMIVCLCCIIVLLLXXI

All Bills to be watered down
All house plants to be watered up
All legislation to be up the spout
All civil liberties to be urinated on

MACHIAVELLI

It's the right thing to do. 1997-2005 Tony Blair

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